Recent adventures, and re-living a moment from the past...

I'm going to summarize last week's adventures, in order of importance (not time):

Met Ryan Gosling at Lucien's. I didn't even know it was him, but my friend Joey tipped me off that it was him (and of course he was right, I'm just blind). Anyhow, at first I was just sitting at the bar, minding my own business, drinking a bloody mary and writing in my notebook. Then I went out to dance in the street. I wasn't dressed up at all, I was in casual clothes with absolutely no make-up on. I hadn't even showered either. Anyhow, as soon as I came back into the restaurant, Ryan and his friends started asking me all kinds of questions (and not one bit did they think I was crazy). Ryan was so down to earth. He asked for my number because he wants to photograph me in action. His friend even took a picture of the piece of paper that I wrote my phone number on in case he'd lose it. On their way out, I saw my phone number in Ryan's shirt pocket! Aaaah. I rarely get starstruck, but he's just so cute, nice and talented of course! Our collaboration may not ever materialize, but I'm so happy I got to meet him nonetheless. Ryan and Steve were on their way to Cannes. He also told me he's moving to New York soon!

Met up with Sara Roberts, the producer for my documentary. Turns out we are going to shoot the film over a period of time, and not just during Fashion Week. She's doing it this way because it'll really capture my life, and it will give them more time to get to know my story, my aspirations, the people in my life, etc.

RELIVING A MOMENT: Here's a Youtube video of me on the bar top at the Top of the Standard last September with Kanye West:

Latest designs - DBT

Here are some of my latest designs. I try to work on designing once a week, so these are from the last two weeks. I enjoy doing this very much and I'm actually getting better at it, at least I'd like to think so! It's fun and I've had so many people compliment me on them.

Easter Celebration with Kelly Cutrone courtesy of my friend Brunson!

Yesterday I got to spend Easter with one of my best friends, Brunson and his boss, Kelly Cutrone (People's Revolution). I've always respected her and have been a fan of her since The Hills, and more recently, The City (I haven't had a TV for two years now, so I haven't watched her new show "Kell on Earth." I like her rawness, realness, and her attitude. I never thought she was a bitch, she just says it like it is, and that's what I love about her. Everyone else on those shows had no personality whatsoever.

Anyhow, I'm so thankful Brunson invited me to join him at her Easter dinner--he could've easily chose anyone else to come with him (he has a lot of friends). We got to Kelly's place at about 3:30pm to help in advance of the dinner. I was all decked out (as per usual) wearing a white dress, my crazy skull jewelry and the shoulder pads I designed earlier this past weekend with a fancy hair piece, colourful eye make-up and sparkles on my face. As soon as she saw me, she remembered that I was the girl she saw dancing on the sidewalk 3 years ago in the Lower East Side. I knew she'd remember me, because about 2 years ago when she saw me outside of the tents at Bryant Park during Fashion Week, she asked me if I was still dancing, to which I responded "yes." It was nice to see her again and to be a guest, as well as a helper, at her party. She immediately put me and Brunson to work, which I didn't mind at all, I always like to help out where I can. At times she would make remarks at me, to which I didn't take offense, it was a part of my "initiation" she said. One comment was "don't break my wine glass with your jewelry" (mocking my dangerous jewelry ;p) and another was when she stuck her middle finger at me saying "fuck you, everyone likes you."

Overall, I had a really good time talking to different people, watching the girls dance and sing, eat amazing food, talk to her mom and help set-up/decorate, and have an Easter celebration like I've never had before.

Highlights of the evening:

•Met Tony Bennett

•Met her daughter Ava and her mom Beverly. Her mom is super sweet, funny and cute!

•Amazing dinner and dessert

•An advance copy of her second book, "Normal Will Get You Nowhere."

My beautiful and talented baby sister, Dung and her design!

My sister Dung just had a fashion show where she designed an awesome, colorful, beautiful dress out of potato sacks, and modeled it herself. No one could've looked any better than her in the dress! She rocked it out, and I'm so proud of her. Here are some photos of her modeling the dress!

I'm thankful that she said I inspired her. That's what the world and people are for. It's hard sometimes, but when you see something like what Dung did, you know you did something right, and it's worth it. Keep pushing, believe in others, just as others will believe in you! I love all of my sisters. I'm so disappointed I didn't get to make it.

Designs by Tiny (DBT) > Tiny Beautiful Dancer (TBD)

Making the Connection between Logic and Chaos

There are times when I wish I could just turn off the thinking part of my left brain and just let the right brain take over, let its full potential be realized (the right brain doesn't do too much thinking, rather it does a lot of creating and imagining). I know this for a fact because I paint and dance without too much thought. I do so much logic, reasoning, if-then analyses at work and just about everything else in my life, from going out to reading.

I'm constantly left-brain thinking when I SHOULD just be RIGHT-BRAIN-LIVING, taking risks that will reward me because of my hardwork, belief and talent, ultimately pursuing what God put me on Earth to do. To inspire, to create, to be an artist, to DANCE, to take this amazing opportunity called LIFE and maximize my seconds, my minutes, my days and my time here on Earth. :D

I recently got offered a different position in my existing group, and it would require a lot of travel. I was supposed to quit today, but my sisters are coming in June, and I need to save money--besides I think it's a good opportunity to hold out just a little longer. I'm leaning towards taking the position because I'm good at it(I'm highly recommended by leadership), and at the same time, if I'm going to quit after June, I need to save money. When I travel, everything except lunch, is on the company dime. I figure if I travel until June, then the money that I would have otherwise spent while staying in New York, would go towards my savings.

Anyhow, to get to the purpose of this post and of what I meant to write about, is that life is about connections, it's about CONNECTING whatever it is that you want to do, to everything that you encounter, from work to obligations, to art, etc. Yes, Accounting may not necessarily connect me to dancing, but I have learned a lot from my company and I appreciate the opportunity thus far. I made a diagram tonight of 15 randomly placed dots. I'm going to write down the most significant 15 things that have happened in my life thus far--that has shaped me to be the person that I am today, right this moment. My life at times can be chaotic, just like anyone else's, and even though we have so much going on, I believe that amongst the chaos, if we understand how everything is somehow connected, and apply it to where we want to be, I think you'll see you're headed in the right direction, as long as you aren't lazy or haphazardly going about your life, and not putting those connections together.

If there are experiences that you continually have over and over that aren't connecting you to where you think you need to be, then yes, again, it's not going to happen. There are many factors we have no control over, but we have choices. We can choose who we hang out with, where we're going, the freedom to find out what inspires us, and how we may inspire others. Focus on those connections that contribute to what you want to be, that contribute to your talent.

So I finally watched Black Swan tonight

I'm so behind, I don't watch movies in the theater as much as I used to. I watched more movies when I lived in California. I love going to the movies with my family that's why, and over here, it's just that I'm so busy with everything else, I don't make the time as much as I'd like to. Anyhow, I filled many pages in my sketchbook with writings and how the movie related to me. It was definitely very intense for me. I liked many aspects of the movie, but at the same time it stressed me out throughout.


Here are some of the words/phrases I've captured in my sketchbook alongside my girl character, Lonegirl (http://www.lonerisms.com/). I don't have a scanner on me, so my blackberry is the best I can do to show what's in my sketchbook right now.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: Essays - Self Reliance

I just bought a book called The Daily Reader, by Fred White http://www.amazon.com/Daily-Reader-Selections-Productive-Meaningful/dp/1582975892, and while on the plane to Tampa last night, I didn't just read one page, I read 200 pages, to which I identified with the selections made by Fred White, what most related to me, what touched me, and spoke to me.

One of the selections I stumbled upon was Ralph Waldo Emerson's Essays on Self Reliance. What rings so true (to me at least) in his essay is this:

"To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men—that is genius. Speak your latent conviction, & it shall be the universal sense; for the inmost in due time becomes the outmost. Familiar as the voice of the mind is to each..."

Self-reliance is about how it is the aversion to conformity. I relate to this because as much as I do try to conform, there is that part of me that wants to be free, that doesn't want to conform, such as when I dance in the streets. I don't want to be confined to just dancing in lounges/nightclubs, I want to challenge the status quo, and declare my own personal independence. That I don't need to be in a nightclub to justify my dancing. I just am.

He further writes: "Nothing is last sacred but the integrity of our own mind...No law can be sacred to me but that of my nature...the only right is what is after my constitution; the only wrong is what is against it."

Behind the scenes of a recent photo shoot

Yesterday I had a small photoshoot with a photographer named Claudio. He spotted me some odd weeks ago walking down on Chrystie Street on my way to Patricia Field. I was going there to show John (store manager) my outfit (see prior blog post). I was wearing my Veritree Hill corset, a poofy skirt, and my feathered Veritree Hill hat (that matches the corset), with Jeffrey Campbell chain/sparkly high heels.

Below are some photos from the shoot taken from my blackberry and from Tiffany's iphone (she's so cute, she's Claudio's assistant)! I had a lot of fun, even though I hate photoshoots because I hate being told what to do without seeing how I look. The studio was very small, and I was hoping we'd take pictures outside during the day time. I hate plane backgrounds and whatnot, but again, he was very kind to give his time to me, and to even want to shoot me.

One of my test shots, taken with a Polaroid camera

With my good friend Rabhy. He's super creative and has crazy style! I love it!

I style myself

I'm so bad about blogging, but I'm going to try to get better about it. Anyhow, here are some pictures I took of the outfits I wore recently. Most of the clothes are from Patricia Field, one of my favorite boutiques! I also recently got my photo taken inside the store so John, one of the managers, could post it on the Patricia Field blog, but I don't know if he'll be able to post it- as Pat is pretty particular about what goes up on the blog. :D

I also got my picture taken when I attended a presentation during New York Fashion Week some weeks ago.

Inside Patricia Field

Photo by Ricky Jones

The Hundred in the Hands - The Young Aren't Young

I really like this band.